We are here!

I know blueberry disappeared for a while...for  a loooong while...We've been busy, traveling, working, adjusting, readjusting, teething...So what have we done? So much.

We went to France to see the family and meet cows. Note the hat and the coat..Yep, it's always sunny in Brittany.

We had an allergy test...I had to really insist on getting one because here there's a belief that babies this young cannot have allergies. So here's a picture from our test. It turns out yes, he is allergic and highly to pollen, dust and a little bit to cow milk. All my suspicions were right. Take that pediatrician who was really  surprised by the results!



BB says a lot of words, mostly in Armenian, some in French and few in English. Then he gets confused, then we get confused...The other day he called me "mooo""(the word he uses for cow) instead of "mama". Given that I still breastfeed, I guess he is kind of right.

Everyday, there's a new adorable moment. The last thing is he hugs his dolls and sings them the lullaby we sing him every night. Cute!

He has more teeth, but they appear in no specific order. One comes from up left, one comes down right and another next to it. I don't understand.


We went to Portugal. Unfortunately, during a heat wave, so we spent  A LOT of time in our hotel room. Mental note: Don't go for a cheap hotel, you will be spending a lot of time in your room. Mental note 2: Go for a hotel that is not very central, you may need some quiet time.

I was so excited for him to swim in the ocean. We failed. First of all he was scared of the sand. He was pulling his legs up and looked completely disgusted. Then he was scared of the waves...He was right though, they were huge and very loud and nobody was swimming. Add to that combination, a very cold water so we decided to wait. But we went to the spa of the hotel together and tried the jacuzzi. And of course, he loved it. He could have stayed there all day.  You had to see him lying down completely relaxed with the warmth.

He had very, very bad food. Every morning he started with a croissant and some sweet pastry. Then we moved on to greasy food, which always included french fries on the side and we finished with more fries at night. He even had his first Happy Meal.

On that note, I noticed that here and also in France people don't mind giving sweet stuff to children. At the creche, they can give them a waffle for instance. I read that some (mostly Scandinavian) mothers are horrified by it and they require their children not be fed any sweet stuff. Should I be like that? I'm so confused.

We are trying to profit from the rare appearance of the sun by going to parks around.  The other day,when we went to a park, he even started playing with 2 girls. He was completely talking to them who kept on asking him ""Quoi?". There I was, sitting at a distance, watching him and thinking he grows up so fast.


I don't know where this came from but all of a sudden he is very much attracted by vehicles. Trucks, cars, buses completely fascinate him. And when he sees people play soccer...nothing can hold him back, he has to go and play with them.

He still cannot walk but can stand holding things. I stopped worrying about it.

Happy Parents

Happy Parents is up!

This mama entrepreneur officially signed her independence :)

As of July, I'm working as an independent and registered Happy Parents as the name of my company :) 

This is a very unknown land for me...It's scary, exciting, unknown, risky...

I have a website:

http://www.happyparents.be/

I'm very proud to say that all done by me. With no help from a tech pro. (I hate the tree image on the right with a family of dad-mom-child, I still have to figure out how to take that off). But have a look at it and please let me know what you think.

I'm starting my first classes next Thursday. It will be a pilot group. A very international group of 5 mothers with babies younger than 4 months who volunteered to come to my place 4 times next month and give me their feedback.

An American lady who offers a similar class here offered to "train" me and proposed me to "help" her run her classes. Not a partnership, I was going to be her grateful "intern"" for learning the job. I declined. She was trying so hard to hold her laugh back when she said I wasn't going to make any money cause I wasn't going to have any customers.  

She is an experienced lady and I think she might be right. And of course, I'm scared that I will fail. This may or may not work but being the fighter I am, I'm not forgetting that expression on her face...and that hidden grin is motivating me.

Perception

At the end, we didn't have another birthday party. He was going to have only one first birthday and I decided to make the most of it. Since I couldn't change the situation, I changed my perception. I decided to be more positive and celebratory and happy. And we were. He was tired, sick but happy.

His grandparents (and tati) came to celebrate this special day with him all the way from France and Turkey. We cooked, we ate, we had champagne, and a nice cake...he ate with us, then slept then came back and played with everyone. It was a nice day at the end. 

He grows up really fast. First of all, now that he has 4 teeth (he has very spaced upper middle teeth, too much breastfeeding?) , he decided to finally put things in his mouth. Like a good Belgian, he started with french fries and could not get enough. Now he very proudly eats bread every morning by himself :)

He is very communicative and started saying a couple of words now, ga-du (armenian word for cat when he sees a cat, bird, dog, well basically all animals), de-de (grandpa). Very impressively but not surprisingly he announces his poop (ca-ca). So then I have to take him to the bathroom and put him in front of a mirror so that he sees himself poop. Now when we are at home, it's OK and I'm happy to do it. But when we are outside as you can imagine it is challenging to find a mirror and hold him up.

Since he heard my parents call my name, he decided to call me with my name. Now when I leave him by himself he calls Da-Da..or De-Da, and sometimes Ne-Da. Great!

We are unsure how much English he understands but the other day Claude told me in English "I'm gonna go" and he started waving bye-bye. But most probably it was just a coincidence, maybe he associates that time of the day with his dad leaving, don't know.

He is a joker. He pretends to throw up and laughs hysterically at my reaction.

I kind of find a babysitter for him. She is going to start mid-May once a week. We will try for a month and see how it'll go. Then I think as of September, we will quit the daycare (we need to give 3-month notice).

I can't believe how big he is getting. He really looks like a little boy. But in my head, he is still my bébé.

1st Birthday

Baby's first birthday was today.

I was so excited...

He had fever and has been coughing for some time. We went to see our doctor today and , yes, it's yet another ear infection and the beginning of a bronchitis.

My poor baby spent his birthday in antibiotics and a 39 degree fever. We're starting the kiné tomorrow.

I am mad at the world for taking away our first birthday.

But on a positive note: despite everything he was still smiley, very tired and in pain but smiley... :)


How I love him!
Happy Birthday my love!

First play date!

Berry's upcoming first birthday is causing some emotional turmoil in this mama. Websites advising to keep your baby's first birthday low-key (!) and inviting 20 people maximum (!!) made me feel terrible about a. my social life (cause I don't know that many people in Brussels) and b. my berry's social life (poor bébé who was deprived from the play date world because of his lazy mama)

So I joined a group of English speaking mothers who meet twice a week with babies ranging from 3 months to 15 months. Since there were no hosts this week,  I said I would go for it. Apparently, at every meeting there are about 8 different mothers. I had only 2 since it is holidays here..and let me tell you 2 was enough!!!

This is the room after people left. The picture does not look that bad but it was bad!

When our guests came, berry was cranky, he refused to take a nap, complained without a stop, spilled his food all over the floor and himself, he finally broke the CD player...and nothing I did worked...

I wanted to be that mother who can quietly have a tea with her friends while her baby plays by himself on the floor content and happy. But I became this mother who is frantic and has to interrupt all conversation that starts because her baby is needy and always wants to be the focus of attention. How did this happen? When did this happen? What did I do wrong?

Blueberry is 11 months (and a half!)

He is becoming more communicative by the day. He says a couple of words, a very sad ma-ma, whenever he desperately needs me to pick him up, or da-this, when he wants to walk.  But we think he understands a lot of words. The other day his dad asked him where was the lady bug in French (meaning the lady bug sticker on the wall) and he pointed to the lady bug...Then of course I went right in and asked in Armenian the same thing and he looked very confused...but whatever...He mostly knows names of instruments (accordion) and animals (canary) and commands and questions like look at me, get up, or where is  this? (both in French and Armenian). How do we know? Because he either points at them, turns his head towards them or presses the button that corresponds to nouns in his picture books.

But challenges continue on motor development side  :) He still cannot pull himself up to stand or to sitting position for that matter but he loves being up and tries to walk up. But I don't see him crawling or walking anytime soon.

He continues to love music. Now he knows how to turn the music player on and off, and how to open the CD player. I suspect the player who endured a shipment from Boston to France will not have a very long life.

chilling with mama

He is still very flirtatious, especially with blond ladies. It's very funny to see how he turns his head whenever there's a blond girl passing. At first I was offended for his preference for blonds, I mean, why not a girl like his mama (right?), but then I thought...OK, he has the right to choose whoever he likes (for as long as I approve of course ;))

His index finger is everywhere. He puts his index finger in his food, on every button he finds, in his nose and  in my nose (great!)

Attachment is full blown, he cries when I step out of the room, he needs to be close to me ALL THE TIME, boy I so want this phase to be over.

Proud grandparents!

For the first time in his life he showed signs of jealousy: I have a nephew now (yayy!) And when I held him in my arms, he started crying, wanted me to pick him up, and of course he claimed my breasts although he was not hungry (like saying you are mine, and this is my milk). I was really surprised because he doesn't do that when I hold other babies. weird!

On a totally unrelated note: I achieved the last step to become a real mother by making home-made yogurt (old-school, no electric devices). And it is delicious! If you are curious, I'll send you the recipe...

Decisions decisions...

I know it's been more than a month since I updated this blog. I have been so very busy with Happy Parents and dealing with new sicknesses and making decisions and decisions.

.


Major decision number 1:
My berry has been sick yet again, this time it was rhotavirus of 10 days followed by a traveler's diarrhea.  You know the story now, 2 different hospitals, 4 different doctor visits, multiple tests, multiple new vitamins and minerals, one baby who lost weight and all his schedule (started getting up at night again, wanted to be breastfed all the time when I was weaning) and one mother who almost lost it.

Then came my decision. I'm taking him out of the daycare. I cannot do this anymore. I'm exhausted and feel like we're paying for nothing. Every month he is at the daycare maybe for 6 days...then at home sick the rest of the time..He's never been in the daycare for 3 weeks in a row since we started. But what made me more sure of my decision is that I checked his growth from his carnet de santé (health book). He was 8 kg at 6 months when he started the daycare, with his sicknesses last month, he went lower than 9 kg  and now he is 9kg4. So in 5 months, he gained only 1 kg. I know that they don't grow as much after the 6th month and 9kg is not that bad for an 11-month-old but that's why there are percentiles and grow charts. He was always in the 80th-90th percentile, after the crèche it was 50th, and now it's even lower.

My pediatrician said that it takes at least 2 winters for his immune system to build up. So I give up. I can't do this for another year.

So now, we're looking for someone who could come to our house to take care of him. I'll keep you posted on the developments.

This picture has nothing to do with decisions but I love these 2 and this picture made me laugh :)

Major decision number 2: 

With or without S was just the beginning of multiple and multiple decisions I have to make daily about Happy Parents (yes, finally, after talking to many marketing experts, it is Happy Parents with an "S")

What template should I choose for my website? What should my job title be? Psychologist, program manager, child development specialist, expert, happiness advocate, unhappy parent extraordinaire?

What animal to use on the logo?What pictures I should use on the website? Is this mom on the picture too pretty and fake and blond? What should I write on the homepage? How can I sound intimate (I'm a mother as well and boy I know it's difficult) but also professional (I kind of have a phd in parenting) How much should I charge people? will I even make any money?

Every step is challenging, every step is difficult, I'm so not in my element when consultants show me excel sheets on budget and feel so stupid that I don't really know the difference between charges and investments.

All I want is to talk to new mamas about parenting and have fun but I'm buried into numbers, figures, charts, and administrative tasks...

I am overwhelmed...

Happy Parent or Happy Parents?

The exciting news is this: I'm starting my own business. This is something that I have been thinking for a very long time. I'm excited. I'm motivated. I feel really alive for the first time in a very long time.
The details about it will follow but basically it will be a structure that offers help to first time mothers (and fathers).

I'm writing my business plan, having meetings with people, thinking of my marketing strategy...I'm so busy...so happily busy.

The name is bugging me though.
I want it to be called "happy parent". But an advertiser advised me to consider "happy parents" instead. My initial reaction was "NO", I want it to be happy parent: one parent at a time. But since then, I'm feeling more and more confused about the name.

This will probably be my first help request out of many more to come but I need your help: what do you think friends? "Happy Parent" or "Happy Parents"? Please help!!

Blueberry is 10 months!!

Thank you  for all your encouraging phone calls, emails and text messages after my "the shadow" post. I didn't realize a lot of mothers were sharing similar feelings. Some exciting things are happening in my life right now and I'll share with you on another post but I'm well and feeling better everyday.

My sweet little son has 10 months. It's really interesting to witness how every interaction becomes progressively more complex, reciprocal and fun.

He loves to play peekaboo but now he can coordinate his hands to hide himself behind a towel and lift it up quickly. And of course then he cracks up.

He is a charmer, he is very smiley, and always gets what he wants not only from me (he knows he doesn't even have to smile to me) but from everybody else as well.

He still LOVES eating, and nobody can get between him and his food. He pretends to chew his mashed food. Since he is so cultivated, he refuses to use his fingers to eat food in little pieces, instead he wants me to feed him with a fork or he tries to eat with a spoon.

In addition to clapping, he learned how to wave good-bye, touch his head to say hello (something Turkish), and my favorite: he raises his fist when I say "revolution"! But every now and then he confuses all and does revolution instead of good-bye and claps yayy when he needs to say hello. Oh well!

He has one tooth that's finally coming...He is late on so many milestones but hey still ahead of his mama who apparently had her first tooth around 12 months...

He seems to finally like the crèche, he is comfortable, smiley and social. But just very recently, he started crying behind us when we leave, I was expecting this would happen and trying to prepare myself but still, I do not like it!

He loves music and points to the radio so that we turn the music on. At every little pause between songs, he stops and looks at the CD player to see when the next song will start.

Yaya is in love!

And he still doesn't crawl, goes only backwards. He hates rolling over, he gets very angry when he rolls over. It's like so energy consuming. Why would anybody do that?

Men in labor!

I came across this hilarious video through a friend. This is the video of two men experiencing labor contractions through some electric device that simulates childbirth. It's a bit long but you can just skim through.

I'm not sure how accurately this device simulates the labor pain but it's funny to see how they really look like women in labor....They could barely handle it for 2 hours....Now how about 10 hours of that plus 5 hours of pushing gentlemen???

The shadow

One day my husband and I were assigning colors to people we knew (OK, it's a weird sentence but bear with me). A common friend was red, because he was full of passion, another orange, because he was full of life...And I started thinking what my color was...I knew I was red at some point, and then gray maybe....but after my son's birth, I felt like I didn't have a color... Everyday I was just doing things I had to do and there was no room for me to express myself...I said to my husband "I don't have a color, I'm just a shadow now".

When Mai-Ni emailed me the website of the glow this thought came back to my mind...Look at all these stylish mothers and their gorgeous houses! I'm not even sure what the website is for but there I was, sitting with my gray hair, my pants full of baby food stain, the top of my sweater full of snot, dark circles under my eyes and exhausted from the previous night...I was "a shadow" once again, far away from this:

but more like this:

or this:

from colourbox.com

And what's worse is that it was not an exceptional day for me. I sometimes don't remember the last time I took a shower, yes, I put on a sweater that had a pee stain on more often than I want to admit, my style includes whatever is stain-free from my closet, if possible, and I combine all with a pink backpack.

But maybe all I need is the perfect summer tote from Coach in order to turn from shadow into glow, maybe one day that perfect tote will magically appear in my living room, do the dishes and the laundry, clean my apartment, prepare food for everybody, bath, change and put my baby to sleep, dye my hair, massage me, and go ahead and do my nails....And then I will glow!!!

Yes, maybe one day...

Trends for Trendy Mamas

Everyday you hear about a new trend in child care and you think, damn it, how did I miss that? I wanted to share with you, adventurous new mothers and mother-to-be's, a couple of things you may not heard of but may want to consider...

1. Teaching your baby sign language
Babies cry, whine and get frustrated and as parents most of the time you really don't know what's going on. Is he hungry? Does he have pain? Does he need to be changed? The idea behind sign language is that you teach your baby the sign for simple and useful words and and they start communicating with you in sign language before they start talking....


Here's a very well-done website. They even have a dictionary and a video clip that goes with every word.
http://www.babysignlanguage.com/

Photo from www.guardian.co.uk

Did I do it? I felt like he was already telling me what he wanted with his own gestures and sounds it was up to me to decipher them. But yeah, did I decipher? No...but I'm working on it. I know of some friends who have successfully done the sign language. If you don't believe, here's a cute video of a 6 month-old using the sign language.

2. Potty training your baby
The idea behind potty training your baby is that instinctually no baby wants to pee or poop on himself, just like other animals. And unfortunately we kind of force them to do that by using diapers. So you train your babies from very early on to pee and poop in the potty.

Here are two interesting links for brave mamas:

http://www.diaperfreebaby.org/

http://www.bornpottytrained.com/

And also for Turkish speakers only, a wonderful blog, and the entry of a mother who uses this technique:
http://yavrusu.blogspot.be/2012/12/tuvalet-iletisimi.html

Photo from http://www.infobarrel.com

As the mother of a social pooper (i.e., won't poop unless you talk him into it), I believe this is true...What did people do before Pampers, right?? I would have liked to try this if he was not going to daycare.

3. Baby led weaning
The idea behind baby led weaning is that children can feed themselves proper food if you just hand them the food. So you don't do mashed anything...Here's the link: http://www.babyledweaning.com/

Photo from http://jesshilton.blogspot.be/2012/04/baby-led-weaning.html

I believe it's important for babies to know what they are eating looks like and smells like. But since I have a strong chocking anxiety, I was not very motivated to hand him things.  Plus he doesn't naturally put things in his mouth (I know, weird!). What I did though was to hand him whatever he was going to eat. For instance, I handed him a whole carrot to play with, before he was eating carrots. But again, I have friends who love this. I don't blame them, this would have saved so much of my time.

4. Baby classes
There are classes out there for both babies and mothers like mom and baby yoga or fitness classes, and also only for babies like bébé nageur (swimmer babies) or Pekip (thanks Mai-Ni), naked babies in a hot room, playing around. It's a good way to get out of the house, do a fun activity together and socialize with other mothers.

Did I do any? I really wanted but no! Should you do it? Yes and let me know how it goes....

Blueberry is 9 months!

He is a funny little character...

On one hand, he is very Middle Eastern...He cries (literally tears) to get more houmous (Can you blame him?) He cannot get enough spicy food made with a lot of onion, garlic, cumin and tomato paste. He shakes his booty whenever he hears any kind of music and is attracted by anything that makes a sound....Here's a little video....

On the other hand he is very French...he likes everything better with cream. He has a sweet tooth and likes finishing his food with a small dessert. He has a very developed palate...The first spoon of every meal he takes just a little bit to see if he likes it. If he does,  he opens his mouth, if he doesn't, no matter what you do, he won't eat. I was joking the other day to my husband that he will soon ask for wine to go with his food.

He sometimes acts like a small man. Someone who met him told me that he looks like he will put on a tie and go to work the following morning, which made me laugh. But that's the impression he gives. Now he systematically refuses to take his baby bottle. A huge problem! No more pacifiers....And he won't drink water unless it's from a glass.

Last month, he started saying things like maaaa, pa-pa-pa, da-da-da, blah, blah, blah...We are all wondering in which language his first word will be...

He still does not crawl and seems in no rush whatsoever to do so.

OH GOSH, HOW I ADORE THIS SWEET LITTLE FACE!!!

We are expecting his first teeth to appear anytime now since we noticed a big bump on his lower jaw...But knowing him, he will probably take his time.

He did his first hike at Sonian Forest last Sunday.... In his Manduca and his father's coat, feeling all warm and cozy, he was talking to the trees until he fell asleep.

And finally, 9-month-mama introspection, which may sound a little too dramatic but here it goes...

Being a mother and caring so much for another human being makes you realize how fragile and delicate life is. Life is not by default, life is not given. Anything can happen at any moment. That's why, everyday I spend with him is a gift. For every single breath he takes, I am grateful.

New Year/New Resolutions

The beginning of every year, husband and I have the tradition to create a resolutions list. I like doing this because it forces me to think of the changes I want in my life.

So the tradition has not changed this year...We sat down and wrote our lists.

3 new items appeared on my list this year.

1. Move your body: Ever since the birth of my blueberry, I haven't been doing any exercises. I tried to run a couple of times  but I have an injury on my left knee that forced me to stop. And no running meant no moving. And I feel terrible about it...It's not about to get thin, it's about being fit and in shape. So this year,  I resolve to move my body.

What did I do to accomplish it? I went to a zumba class last night. What? Zumba. Yes, I didn't know what it was either. It's kind of a dance work-out. The idea sounded interesting but there I was doing Jennifer Lopez moves (oh so ridiculously) and completely unable to follow the choreography. I found myself thinking, what the hell am I doing here...  Zumba made me realize how much I miss running. I'm no JLo, so I'm gonna give my left knee a second chance. 

2. Couple time: Husband and I have been very bad at this. We had a date night without bébé only twice in 8 months. That's pretty pathetic. Plus everytime we are together, we are so exhausted that we just wanna go to bed. I resolve to have a date night at least once a month and create at least 5 minutes everyday where we talk about us, not baby-related stuff, not things that need to be done the following day, just us.

What will I do to accomplish it? Will study the babysitter market, will find out how you find them, how much you pay them, how it works etc. 

3. Friends:

I have been a bad friend. Yes, I was the woman in the cartoon. No time to talk, no time to listen, I was absent from my friends' lives. New relationships started, old relationships ended, some of my friends have been sick and I found out months later. I'm sorry you guys, I love you. I resolve to be a better friend this year.

What will I do to accomplish it?  I will call, email, skype. I won't wait for the perfect time to call you. Cause I learned, it doesn't exist.


*****************

What are your resolutions??

Happy New Year!

Oh my! This lazy blogger of yours did not do one single entry in over a month!!! Tell me about holidays....

My dear friends....

I wish you all a healthy, prosperous, peaceful new year full of snuggles...

And here's the sweet face of my little Santa